Relationship Series Post Number 4... the final chapter

So, No relationship series would be complete without a section on conflict. I am convinced that conflict is the single greatest help and the single greatest hinderance to building real relationship.

It is the single greatest help because it forces us down to those risky places in our hearts that we work to keep covered up. We feel exposed and vulnerable and often react in silly ways to what is going on around us. We have already talked about how it is necessary to get to these places in our lives because we have to go there to allow the Word to transform us at that level. These are those moments where we do things and say things that we regret. We let our worst side out - we become the person that work to keep hidden from the world - the most real version of me.

It helps because we are forced to deal with those places in ourselves that we hide even from ourselves. But that is where the point of real transformation can take place. That helps us become more when we deal with conflict rightly... and it reinforces poor behavior when we allow it to consume us and we deal with it poorly. This is where it can also be most hurtful in relationship. But it is our choice in how we deal with conflict helps or hurts us - not the conflict itself.

So, scared of conflict? Take a deep breath, then charge in... not be right or to make the other person feel wrong, but to bring resolution to what conflict does in yourself. Then you can have a heart of peace no matter the circumstances.

May you understand that peace does not come from ease. Peace comes from a decision to let God and His Word penetrate your soul at its deepest level. And may you celebrate conflict as an opportunity to go there. May you love people more that correctness. And may you be transformed by the peace that conflict can bring.